Call me ISHMAEL or YOCKEY

When you get up in the morning to the sound of your bones creaking, the last thing you want is further reminder of your antiquity. Shirley and I did not want to be called Grandma and Grandpa after our little grand babies were born. She has had the nickname "Kitty" for a long time. Her many feline characteristics support this choice. The babettes have never had trouble pronouncing "Keetee, Keetee" and that is her official name. In my writing I refer to her as "the Kitty."

When I was being confirmed (Catholic Bar Mitzvah) at 13 years old, I chose my own confirmation name, Rocky. When I reached the front of the line, the nun, Sister Mary Knucklewhacker, was standing next to the Bishop who would anoint and bless me (a lot of good that did ). She asked me my name choice. I told her "Rocky." She said rather loudly "That's not a biblical name. You have to pick a biblical name, or the name of a Saint." The bishop overheard her starting to get hot under the habit and intervened. "Sister, there is a Saint Rocco." So that is my confirmation name. When the Famiglets started to speak, Kitty was Keetee but Rocky became Yockey, or Yaki, or Yacqui, anyway, phonetically it was Yockey. Why do kids have so much trouble with "R?" It did not seem to matter that Rocky was my real nickname...everybody repeated their version until it was cemented into the zeitgeist of our family. To perpetuate this pronunciation error and to subtly register approval of "Yockey" over the alternative "Rocky" I have received inscribed books and a hat with YOCKEY embroidered on it.

Being the Googler that I am, I "had to" look up all the various forms of Yockey on the internet. They range from a philosopher, to a nuclear physicist, to a conservative lesbian blogger. Yacqui is a tribe of indians. Yaki is a semitic nickname for Jacob. Rocky, on the other hand is a strong American nickname usually found in the pugilistic profession. Rocky Marciano, Rocky Graziano, and of course one of my heroes, Rocky Balboa. I don't think Sly's movies would have been nearly as successful if his character's names were Yockey Balboa, or Yambo.