"F" THE ENVIRONMENT, I WANT A HEMI

Many years ago, the movie ROBOCOP was released. I have seen it several times and it is entertaining as well as provocative. One of my favorite lines in the movie is when the Mayor of Detroit (where the movie takes place) brandishes a weapon and barricades himself in an office. The movie takes place in the future and the environmentalists have been in charge for a long time and many things we take for granted today are unavailable. The mayor demands as a condition of ending the standoff " A car with leather seats that gets really crappy gas mileage."

I tell this story in response to all the claptrap I have heard up here about recycling, and fuel consumption, the oil spill, and whatnot. Meanwhile, the average vehicle up here is a Jeep Wrangler that has the aerodynamics of a brick and gas mileage in the "teens."(Can you spell hypocrite?) Admittedly, there are lots of Mini Coopers too. I have not seen a PRIUS in 2 months. Don't you just want to tell the government and those whack-job environmentalists out there to get the Hell out of your way? Every once in a while, when I am listening to the TV news and they are interviewing some tree hugger about SUVs or Private jets and how they are ruining the planet, I get the urge to run out and buy something that gets abysmal fuel mileage and is too large to fit in my garage. The very word "GREEN" makes me want to hurl. I'll be damned if I am going to eat any breakfast cereal that has tree bark in it. Separating the plastic from the glass from the tin cans and putting them all in clear plastic bags is beginning to piss me off.

I tried to explain some of my frustrations to a young man I met at the Wharf Rat Club yesterday but he has never been free having been born and raised in the Nanny States of America singing the anthem..."Kumbaya." I tried to tell him about America when we used to have to feed ourselves and buy our own insurance, and where schools were places of learning not gunfire. He did not get it. And I am not surprised. It was like trying to explain colors to someone who was blind from birth. Anyhow, in this world run amok with political correctness, cultural diversity uber-ales, moral relativism, and environmentalism (way too many "isms") I just want to turn on my sprinkers, drive a gas-guzzler, leave my A/C on all the time, and throw out all those CFL lightbulbs and replace them with 250 watt bulbs. Unfortunately, the gross mismanagement of our country by the same people who are forcing this crappola on us, has left me with fewer dollars to pay for all this so I will have to wait until the economy bounces back. By then we will have to recycle our toilet water.