Where is the HAZMAT team?

Two nights ago the "you need gas" light went on in my SUV. The following morning the Kitty had an appointment to get some lab tests and since she had to be fasting she went as early as possible. There was a window of opportunity for us to have breakfast together between the lab and the ground-up restoration she had scheduled at the salon at 9. I left the house and planned to stop at our local Shell station to gas-up. I pulled in, swiped my credit card and began pumping, with the nozzle on automatic... with the presumption that it would shut itself off when the tank was full. I stood nearby to the rear of the fuel filler door. Unfortunately, either the car or the pump did not do what it was supposed to and gas poured out of the tank onto my shoes.

I tried to reach the Kitty as we had planned to meet at a cafe next to her salon. I could not reach her so I felt it was best to press on to the meeting place with all the windows open and my shoes off and in a bag. The gas smell was awful. At that hour in the morning, I have to pass through a school zone to reach my destination. Everyone slows down to 15 mph...except for this morning when there was some woman on the side of the road with a hand-lettered sign that said "Radar Today." Of course, everyone went 5 mph and I had to sit there in fumes for longer. To add insult to injury, landscapers on both sides of the road were blowing grass clippings and dust into the road and into my open windows...and nostrils.

I reached the cafe but bailed out quickly and after inhaling a muffin and some water, I drove to the Mercedes dealer. They told me it was not the fault of the car. I asked if they would at least detail my car for me which they quickly did...and give me a better bag for my shoes, which they did. I drove home in virtually no smell (some residual from underneath the car since there was so much spillage) and made the command decision to throw away my shoes, and put my clothes in the washer and took a shower. I left my car in the driveway with the windows all open.

I forgot to tell you the best part of all of this. As I was watching raw gas pool around my feet before I could shut off the pump, I noted some derelict standing at the front bumper of my car smoking a cigarette. I looked at him about to tell him to get the Hell away while I was pumping gas. He beat me too it and said..."Hey man, gas is pouring out of your car."

All is well and what does not kill you or makes you go up in flames like a buddhist monk, makes you stronger. Anyhow, the lesson I have learned is that if at all possible, don't trust that automatic shutoff in gas pumps. And don't fill you tank all the way. This is an event I will not forget as I was very close to tragedy...gas on a hot muffler, smoking dude about 6 feet away, and standing in a puddle of High Test. Fortunately all it cost me was a pair of my favorite shoes and a couple of lost hours. I got a clean car, and an important lesson in life.