I'm going to JACKSON (laboratory)

Sarasota is all a twitter over the prospect of Jackson Laboratory moving to our area. Though there is not 1 in 1000 people living in Sarasota County that can tell you what Jackson Laboratory does, everyone on the county and city commission seems to think this is the best thing since sliced cheese. It will create anywhere between 11 jobs and 3 million jobs and grow an economic Utopia that would make the post-war baby boom look like a lemonade stand. Few of the articles written about the Jackson Lab mention that in order for this move to happen, the State of Florida would have to give Jackson 100,000,000 dollars and the county another 100,000,000 (one hundred million) dollars and free land, and a 120,000 square foot building, and cover any losses they might have from operations for the first few years. Other than that, Mrs. Lincoln, how did you enjoy the show?

The Gulf Coast has 600,000,000 in unfunded pension obligations, Sarasota had a budget shortfall, this year, and just bribed the Orioles to come here for spring training by building them a 30,000,000 stadium when there are players on the team that probably make that much in salary. We just completed a 46 million dollar city police station (planned before the downturn), and all new traffic signal upgrades for more millions. I don't know about you, but last time I looked, the economy is in the crapper, joblessness is rampant, we extended unemployment benefits out to 99 weeks, and we are at war in at least two places on the globe and more on the horizon.

The ORACLE is going to go out on a limb here and make a prediction....the leaders of our town and county will do anything they can to make this happen no matter that we are busted flat and broke. Alternatively, Jackson will move on to another location to see if they can find another sucker to put up all the money to build their new lab, in the hopes that jobs (too high tech for our high school graduates) or building and development will make East Overshoe the next silicon valley of medical technology.

Ask yourself...other than breeding millions of lab rats...what the heck do they do in Jackson Laboratory? One non-clinical department I am sure they have is the one called "Let's see if we can get some wannabe town to build us a new facility at no risk to us." Don't worry though, if Jackson does not come, I hear that there is a Unicorn Farm looking for some seed money and a place to set up shop. Our work force will be able to fill those shovel-ready jobs. Too bad we don't have people who are trained to do genetic research and most of the future Jackson employees for those jobs will be coming from elsewhere. Our local merchants will have to learn how to speak Hindi or Mandarin.